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Expectations

"You were uniquely created on purpose to do something Great!!! What is purposed for you to do, only you can carry out. Don’t forfeit your purposeful assignment to be and do something you were never purposed for."

I often wonder… why do we find ourselves doing and being something we were never purposed for? Could it be we are somehow trying to live up to some form of expectation… whether it be our own or that of others?

I know, at one point in time, I expected perfection of myself in everything. I needed to be the best in this… the best in that. I was such an overachiever. Everything had to be perfect… mistake free… and when it wasn’t, I thought something was wrong with me. Little did I know my need to be perfect stemmed from the insecurities I deeply harbored within myself. Not knowing that such unrealistic expectations only highlighted my shortcomings and inadequacies at greater heights. Striving for perfection was my way of trying to compensate for my imperfections. I focused on that which I thought I lacked and desperately thought I needed to be happy, be liked, and loved by others. I unconsciously gave up on myself and unconsciously made a decision to strive to be something I thought I and everyone wanted.

For years, I tried to live up to the expectations of others and that which I expected of myself… What a full time job!!! It left me devastated, empty, and clueless. Quiet as it’s kept, trying to live up to any expectation is an epic fail. Sad thing, we have difficulties trying to figure out what we want and honestly we have no idea. We are fickle and consistently inconsistent... we’re this person one day and a different person the next. We change at the opportunity to fit into the in crowd, attach to a person who has the status we think we want… We change at the opportunity to get that house, that car, and that money …. But we are miserable. Why??? Could it be we’re doing and being something we were never purposed for? How can we appear to have it all, but lack so many things? How can we appear to be happy, but inwardly dislike ourselves? How can we appear to love ourselves, but have no sense of self-worth or value?

We fall into the trap… the trap of striving and chasing after our own unrealistic expectations and the expectations of others… we fail only to disappoint others but most importantly ourselves. We become exposed and feel more inadequate and insecure. The pattern becomes a vicious cycle until we build up the courage to face ourselves. Confront ourselves, spend time pulling off the layers… get to know who we are and what we have been purposed for. Each of us have been purposed to do something great… something extraordinary. Let’s not spend another day doing and being something we were never purposed for. Let’s spend time getting to know ourselves: our authentic selves… I bet you’ll surprise yourself, once you find out how amazing you are.

"For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."

Ephesians 2:3

Xoxox,

Dr. Dyoni

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DR. DYONI COLE

Minister       Dancer       Author

Personal Developer

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